"Nina Simone's 'Four Women'"

     May I just intrude everyone's life right now and scold a huge percentage of you for not allowing your ears to experience the brutal and impeccably beautiful talent of a group of women that possess a ridiculous amount of soul? I'm doing it anyway. If you're not aware of Nina Simone, I deeply suggest you reevaluate your music life!!! We have been graced with singers from previous decades that tell better stories through their songs than stories told around a fire like Etta James, Bessie Smith, Patti Paige, Josephine Baker, Doris Day, Billie Holiday, Anita Baker, and of course, Nina Simone (JUST TO MENTION A FEW...don't get too rowdy)! Anyway, I'd been brought up on songs before and during my time from every genre, and Nina Simone was one of the few soul artists who forcefully made room for themselves to be situated in every one of my playlists. Some years prior, I'd been introduced to Nina Simone's "Four Women". "Four Women" told the stories of four different women with different backgrounds. Different and deep enough to put a lump in your throat. These women varied in complexion, hair type and texture, feel, emotion, and tale, but they were African American...and they were WOMEN...sisters even. They contributed to the realities of the past as well as the present, and if you listen closely and open your mind to the living of another sister, you may meet them.

     In 2011, Nina Simone made her way back into my soul when Ledisi (way too underrated), Jill Scott (LOVE Jill...yyasssss), Marsha Ambrosius (Marsha! Marsha! Marsha!), and Kelly Price (!!!!) ANNIHILATED the stage after performing Simone's "Four Women" at the Black Girls Rock Awards.

 They didn't just perform; they LIVED the stories that belonged to those women Nina shared. Since that performance, life has never been the same...and I'm not celebrity crazy, but this will do it to you. We are cheated in classrooms when it comes to history...when it comes to the realities of brutality and injustice, struggle, beauty, and image. "Four Women" offers some of what those edited books do not. It's not likely that everyone will understand and feel the depth of this song...or performance, but it is fulfilling. It is blunt. It is strong. It is real...and beautiful...and amazing. I try to listen to this song everyday before I start my day or when I am winding down because...I have to. It is my reminder. Plus, with Kelly, Ledisi, Jill, and Marsha, you'd be a mess to skip a track of theirs. All beautifully talented. All beautiful. Anyway, I've posted the video below just in case you're a "Four Women" virgin!

SN: I still love you Amy and Adele!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nf9Bj1CXPH8 (Nina Simone performance)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E_ilDi2L8mw (Kelly Price, Marsha Ambrosius, Jill Scott, and Ledisi performance)

 Enjoyyiiieeeee.

With Realness,

B. Elae
8/18/2014

"The Woman, and Her 'Whitest-Black guy' Boyfriend"

Heeeyy (quick wave):

I am blogging in to share an experience I encountered earlier yesterday while I was simply trying to pick out the perfect brand of (costly) pretzels that the health articles boast about. They're delish by the way! Different flavors and all-uh-that! Anyway ---> I was in the grocery store sorting through the various pretzel brands and flavors ( a.k.a pretzel probs), and I asked another woman in the same aisle if she'd tried these pretzels I was checking out. The woman and I were having a nice conversation about healthy eating...and then, she continued with: "My boyfriend makes sure we all eat healthy. I'm telling you (laughs)! He is the Whitest Black guy you will meet. He's not like them. I mean he eats healthy, dresses nice..." By the time she'd hit "dresses nice", I was in a whole different state of mind and thought. It's interesting...what people say...not knowing what or how they say it...in any situation...AND not being aware of the type of response they could receive.

THAT'S THE ONE OF THE PROBLEMS: People not knowing (or not caring) what they say, how they say it, and how it makes them look when it relates to negative stereotypes directed towards certain races, ethnicities, cultures, sexual orientation, religions, practices, generalizations, etcetera. To make this easier, the problem is-still- the MINDSET and the AUDACITY of persons to believe their negative mindsets and verbal responses via stereotypes are applicable to every individual they encounter, AND the audacity of persons to accept stereotypes and generalizations stemmed from negativity that are given unto them. I can even chop it down more: THE AUDACITY. The audacity for this woman to totally throw our simple (and fun) conversation down the drain with the nerve she possessed to be comfortable enough to tell a stranger that could possibly be of the same race as her "whitest Black guy boyfriend" that he was not like "them". "Them" as in the rest of the males of the same or similar African American/Black race. She had it WRONG. As my facial expression changed and my smile dropped like someone had just asked me if my eyes were "real" (UUUUUUUGHH -_-), I contemplated my options for response: 

1.) Game face...and address her, but put the pretzel bags down because she'll probably get offended and too rowdy and feel herself too much.. and end up landing face down? Nah, that's already how people expect me/us to react.

2.) Laugh it off, grab my pretzels, and go? NO...too easy.

3.) Let it slide...today...because I'm hungry and I JUST got off of work? Something too consider, but NO.

4.).......COMPLETELY POP OFF??!!! AND Check her about that hot mess of an outfit she had on while force-feeding her these "healthy" ass pretzels... And then ask for forgiveness later?   YEP!!!! Jk, jk, jk!

Realty set back in...and I found myself staring at her-an "I-know-you-did-not-just-let-those-words-slide-out-of-your-mouth-in-this-empty-aisle" death look. She finished her laugh and started walking. "Right, because 'them' Black guys all are the same, huh? ." I wasn't finished. I contemplated approaching her again and offering her my FULL response, but in situations similar to these, you need more time...because emotions often create the craziest word vomits and actions ever, and I wanted to walk away still holding onto my maturity, my snacks (yaasss), and representing my belief in knowing that not every person is the same. I felt like I hadn't done enough. I wanted to check her so much more. I wanted to check the whole store, at this point. But, really, what I'd stated was enough for the circumstances of the situation. I wish I could have yelled it, honestly. I wish I could have told her how pathetic and pitiful her words were. I wish I could have told her how susceptible she was, and how dating her "Black" man doesn't grant her the right to categorize the rest of them. WHO ARE YOU? How dare you. How BASIC of you...but I hit that one line that could grab everything I'd wanted to say and do enough...for the time being. Did it do enough? Did she get it? I wouldn't doubt it if she didn't. Do YOU GET IT? 

It's bad enough some of our negative thoughts, beliefs, attitudes, and treatment towards others are based off of the opinions of someone else and not our own, but take some moments to control your own mind, and take the time to pick out appropriate responses and learn about something! It's a pity how pliant we are when it comes to accepting attitudes towards other people unlike us without actually taking the time to know them or see them. So many faults in that. And have we REALLY made it okay to accept things like this when it's NOT okay...but it's portrayed to be in many instances. I could have easily asked her, "Have you slept with every Black man to know how the rest of them are?" 

 You may feel like I didn't do enough...and a nice handful of you that KNOW me know my responses for issues I am passionate about -including this one- consist of far more than a "one hitter quitter" response....but I've been learning about choosing situations that need in-depth responses, and those that don't. Plus, I was on the verge of reacting differently, so I needed to spew out the cleanest response I could offer at that moment. Seeing and reading the responses from some of my friends after I shared the woman's remarks with them was welcoming though: A "Bish Whet??" from Vicky; a " So Black guys don't eat healthy??" from 'Randa; a "0 too 100 real quick" from Noah' and a "-_-" from BJ. I won't tell you how the Mom reacted! Too exclusive.

BUT, I'm learning how to decipher which situations need a lecture and when one line does justice even when it doesn't feel like it does. The woman's remarks aren't uncommon, and that bothers me that multiple people carry that minuscule mindset. It's unfortunate negative stereotypes are still given a place to position themselves because we grant them permission. So, to the woman I spoke with in the store today, if you ever come across this blog or any blog closely related to this one, I hope you know you have some mental remodeling to do. I hope you can better practice your word selections, and understand you're no different than any other robot walking this Earth that possesses that same vexatious,vile, FEEBLE, and sad mindset. She is just a reminder that there is work that still needs to be done with the molding of all of our minds. Think better, do better.

With Realness,

B. Elae

"Facebook Challengers"

Dear "Challengers":

For some weeks, my timeline (from time to time) has been occupied with various short videos entailing humans setting themselves on fire, choking out another human, throwing boiling water on someone, and eating Vaseline. I must say, BRAVO! While you're striving to receive "likes" and "shares" on social networks, acknowledgement, and more friends, you're also marking your territory in the stereotypical images department for your generation...AND displaying how willing you are to put your safety at risk for people that probably wouldn't join, help, or know how to save you if they were with you during your adventurous and heroic stunt. While you're just "having fun" because you're bored (or extremely eager to start a new trend), you're also demonstrating what little self-love and creativity you have for yourself. Your "Bad-ass card" has been revoked. I assure you that some of you are unaware of the criminal charges you could receive for those tag team pass-out challenges (eheem.. manslaughter)? Or maybe you don't care. Either way, don't drop the soap and prepare for some clothes you'll be wearing for some time while reminiscing about how fortunate you were to have had your family and freedom, and someone to buy your clothes and materialistic items for you! Then you'll be looking like this:

..... While living in a place like this: 

Fire challenge friends, how about those burns and medical bills that you probably can't pay for? Someone else probably has to pay for your careless choice, huh?

You're taking up time in the E.R while someone, somewhere, with a stray bullet wound could be fighting for their last breathe, or someone who is losing the battle to a deadly disease is willing to give anything to be able to LIVE their life. And you, well you, you CHOSE your injury.What about the inconsideration towards the person taking care of you and those bills that are gonna be pretty costly? No, no, here's one: What about your life? No? Not too important? Okay. Setting yourself on fire could also be perceived as attempted suicide (arguable) which would, then, deem you as unstable and could get you sent off (which leads to more bills you probably don't pay) and, also, limited freedom. Have you smelled burning flesh before?

No? Well, it's foul. Perhaps you are unable to reach that shower head to rinse off and your home catches on fire, taking the lives of others, but you live? But you're not thinking about that..because you need the "likes". Yes, the "likes". Those "likes" of so many people that sit and view your short video, but wouldn't join you. The "likes" and "shares" of people that state how much of a follower you are while they laugh at you. OH Most importantly, you're doing exactly what someone wants you to do: killing yourself off...so they don't have to, of course. You're now one less individual to pay mind to because you are no longer perceived as anyone of importance or viewed as capable of creating positive change. Because they don't have to worry about you. You're feeding into the stereotypes people have towards your generation, and you're displaying to a numerous amount of people that you aren't a leader. That you're susceptible and willing to seek attention by any means. That you're willing to give someone else your life because you don't value it! Is it really that necessary?

I didn't think so either...

Google Image                                    

With Realness, 

B. Elae
8/2/14

Image Links:

Http://www.google.com
http://www.mkwhy.com/top-10-ways-to-survive-prison/
http://uvahealth.com/services/plastic-surgery/conditions-treatments/22574
http://www.funnyjunk.com/funny_pictures/1464934/EXTREME/

"Memes That Fail..." B. Elae

We get it...memes, e-cards, and images with remarks that obtain obscenities, racial and gender remarks ( and etc), and other captions with images that intentionally seek mixed responses (similar to PETA ads except these images aren't attempting to "convince" their viewers to refrain from eating and wearing animals. These images are for giggles. For "likes", for "shares", for expressing our emotions without verbally expressing them, and for "reactions". But in some instances, these images do more than cross the boundaries of being disrespectful and inconsiderate. Here, I will share these "award winning" images edited to receive the responses some of you may possess after viewing them. Unfortunately, sharing these photos will increase the views which, sort-of-kind-of feeds into their desire for acknowledgement (bummmerrr), but it's important to address photos similar to these because of the number of individuals making light of situations and not focusing on how they are offensive.  Mmmmhhhhmmm!

Downy has NEVER looked better! -_- Why? Because instead of using the original image, someone thought it'd be hilarious to paste a picture of someone with Down Syndrome on the front of the label of the detergent bottle. I surfed the 'net for this image and found it on a website where I viewed some of the responses to the image. It was interesting seeing how many people thought this was funny, how some people were going to "share" it on Facebook, how many people did not understand the "joke", and how mane people were upset that this was done (1 person). Of course, in comes the "Oh, it was a joke"/"Lighten up"/"Stop being so uptight" remarks, but I'm fine with that...because laughing at the expense of someone else isn't something I seek time to do or agree with. This "joke" has the ability to affect a numerous amount of individuals dealing with Down Syndrome, individuals related to people with Down Syndrome, and anyone that seeks the right to accept and acknowledge beautiful people who possess anything remotely "different than" what society deems as "normal" from the physical and mental aspect. Because this image reiterates the possibility of making someone with DS feel as if they are significant, only, when they are the center of a "joke". Because posting things like this makes it okay and easier for it happen again...with anyone. This "funny" meme takes an L and a seat (throws chair).

Our runner up: The Cotton Meme
This will be brief. It's foul enough our history books and courses leave out (or edit) some of the actual events, figures, and changes that have taken place. Yeah, I  just went there. It's insane that many minds are fed information in reference to history and don't inquire about or respect things that have occurred, but I'm certain all of us (if not all...a nice number) are familiar with slavery. You know slavery, right? Where humans are under the possession of someone else and are forced to work (with extra cupcake sprinkles of other duties) while dealing with limitations, inequalities, and unjust actions? Yeah, that. Maybe that will help with understanding how this meme is also offensive. We laugh and take it lightly-forgetting (or not really caring) that pickin' cotton  actually existed as a form labor for individuals of a certain race. And the kid's face (in the front) makes the meme even more comical, but what about the history behind the image? Although we may not know the exact races of every young person in the image, could the caption in the meme not only make light of slavery and forced labor, but also speak about the perceptions made about the intelligence towards people of the African and African American/Black race/culture? Perhaps, this will be my fault for bringing up these images and sharing the issues? Maybe I'm over-reacting or not "letting go" of the past, but I won't. Had there been an image making light of eugenics, the Holocaust, the kidnappings of children, the mistreatment of Native Americans...or anything else, I'd be just as serious...because it IS serious. Take another L meme-team. Make your memes, but make them with consideration.

With Realness, 

B. Elae